The day of love <3

Here’s the thing. I love love. I think the world needs a lot more of it. I think it conquers all. I truly believe that Beatles were right when they sang, “All you need is love.”

And February 14th is a day created to celebrate all the love in our lives. Sure, it’s morphed into a horrible, money obsessed, Hallmark holiday, but the core of the day is still there.

As a kid, I liked Valentine’s Day. You made cards for the whole class and everyone got a valentine. Then in the 4th grade, they quit making us give the entire class cards, and I began hating the holiday. It was just another popularity contest in my opinion. It made me sad cause I hardly got any cards from anyone. Then in high school it became about what your boyfriend sent you at school and date dances which made me feel like a complete loser because I never had a boyfriend or a date to dances. In college, I had a boyfriend and we did the gifts and stuff and it was great. It was nice to know I had a valentine for the day. For Valentine’s 2010, Josh even went as far as to buy me a puppy for Valentine’s Day. Maisy will remain the greatest valentine gift I’ve ever received.

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But still, I don’t know, it’s never been a holiday that I get all giddy about. Until, Valentine’s Day 2013. Yes, it’s just another thing that’s changed since I’ve become a mom. I love Valentine’s Day now that I have a little valentine. I get to dress her up each year and make Valentine’s with her each year and share sweets with her.

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The thing about this holiday now that I’m a mom is I realize it isn’t about getting the flowers or diamond from a boy. It’s about love. My world has been grounded back into the true meaning of the holiday. This is a whole day dedicated to feeling and sharing the greatest gift anyone can ever have – to love and be loved. There is nothing more important than that. It’s hard having a toddler who destroys the living room you just cleaned on a daily basis and who doesn’t understand inside voices yet. It’s hard having a spouse who’s gone for 10 hours a day. It’s hard to remember to stop and pet the dog or cat between baths and books and bedtime. Its hard not to just give your husband a quick peck on cheek and go to sleep at night.

And so, on the calendar, there is a day – a day I mark with a heart every year and then I go through and add birthdays. It’s a whole day dedicated to remembering why you do the things you do day in and day out. To remember that you love that loud singing toddler who’s kicking toys at the sleeping cat more than anything else on this planet. A day to stop and snuggle the puppy and to let the cat lounge by your head in bed. A day to spend dinner with your husband talking to each other about whatever you want because there’s no toddler in a high chair to have to try and keep happy at the table. It’s a day to stop and be thankful for the ones you love and be even more thankful for the ones who love you. Granted, it’s something you should stop and do that every day, but life, unfortunately, gets in the way of that more often than not. So I love that little reminder on the calendar each February.

I hope everyone out there had a wonderful Valentine’s Day! I know I did. I’m gonna focus on trying to bring the hearts and love into my life more often. Cause “love is all you need.”

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Long over due post

So, since I lasted posted there’s been Halloween

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Thanksgiving

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Christmas

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New Years

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Josh’s birthday

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And now we’re creeping up on Valentine’s Day. How it happened I’m not sure. I could easily blame the fact that it’s such a busy time of the year as well as the fact that I was still feeling awful and sick right up to Christmas. With three ER visits, losing my job, and dealing with unnecessary family drama, I have plenty of valid reasons as to why I haven’t written. None of them are good enough though. Josh is always encouraging me to write. He told me the other day that he considers me “a real writer.” Ha. I wish. Maybe someday. For now, I haven’t even been keeping up with my blog. So, update and try again I will. I want to be back to doing a post a week. We’ll see what happens.

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So I suppose I should start with a big huge baby update. So much for weekly updates. Anyways, here’s Baby M’s week 25(!!) update:

How far along? 25 weeks and 3 days

Total weight gain/lost: +2lbs since I got pregnant which apparently isn’t the best. We also found out today that Baby M weighs 2lbs so that must be where it’s coming from.

Maternity clothes? Embracing them this time around. I love the few pieces I have and wish I had more! Not gonna spend the money though.

Stretch marks? Not any new ones that I can tell. They’re all still left over from Ellabelle

Best moment of the week: Ultrasound to check on Miss Baby M

Missing anything? I wish I could eat Jimmy Johns and that this baby would let me eat meat. She’s not a fan.

Movement? Sometimes. She’s either dancing hardcore or chillin calmly.

Cravings: fruit, baked goods, salads, grilled veggies

Anything making you queasy or sick? Just meat when I try to eat it

Have you started to show? A little, not as much I though I would be with this being baby #2

Labor signs? Braxton hicks this time around, but nothing else

Belly button in or out? in

Wedding ring on or off? On and still a little loose.

Mood: varies from moment to moment

So, Baby M has been trying to give her big sisters pregnancy a run for its money since the very beginning. I had sever abdominal pain at the end of September and passed out at work. So Josh took me to the ER. They found nothing really wrong and I got bedrest for 48 hours. Then I couldn’t breathe. Spent a whole afternoon in the ER and there was nothing to show for that either. I did get an inhaler, but it doesn’t seem to help as much as they said it would.

IMG_0140-0 Then the day after Christmas I found out that I had low lying placenta and needed to be put on pelvic rest. Then on the Saturday after Christmas, I had a lot of fluid come out and was worried it was amniotic fluid. Turns out I just had an infection which was good for baby, not so good for me. That has since been treated and we’ve been doing ok for the most part. I still have a lot of pain in my lower back and shoulders and I hate Braxton Hicks but we’re all still hanging in there.

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Today, they confirmed that everything looks great and that Miss M is still indeed a Miss M. I’m nervous and excited about her coming. I want her here so we can love on her and watch her grow and experience all the fun firsts again. I’m also nervous cause there’s gonna be two kids against me everyday. I’m about to be outnumbered. I’m worried about how Ellabelle will adjust. I’m worried I won’t love her as much anymore. I’m worried about being sleep deprived on top of having a crazy toddler. There’s a lot of worrying going on, but I’m trying not to think to much about it and focus on all the good about to come.

As for now, it’s been a long day and I’m not feeling well. So, I’m hoping for an early night.

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