Glimmer of hope

The past two days have been filled with sadness. Has anything happened in my life? Directly? No. Everyone is happy and healthy and thriving. We are beyond lucky for these simple yet oh so precious things. The sadness has been a shared sadness with people I haven’t ever met. We share a very deep and common link: we are parents. And as parent, we love our children so fiercely that it hurts sometimes and we can understand and feel the ache for one another when a child is lost. 

What if it had been my child? It easily could’ve been. Just this evening, Ellabelle was running around the driveway while I looked on. She could’ve easily stepped off of the curb at exactly the wrong time and my story could be that of a momma grieving on instagram. In a matter of two days, over 20,000 people have reposted and shared her loss (#redballoonsforryan). We can’t be there with her, but we can let her know she’s not alone. It could’ve easily been one of our children instead of her sweet, wild-haired 3 year old that stepped off that curb.  

Uncertainty is the scariest part of parenthood. There are so many things out there we can’t control. Here is this perfect little human we made and when their body turns on them its scary because theres absolutely nothing you can do to help them. Ellabelle has had allergies since spring started trying to make its arrival. My heartbreaks for her when she’s upset and hurting because of the congestion. I can’t even imagine the agony of watching your child fight something as awful as cancer and knowing there was nothing you could have done to prevent it or to cure it. There’s a video making the rounds on Facebook about a sweet little boy who recently passed who was huge WWE fan. The video alone reminds me why I still have such tremendous respect for the WWE as a company and as a whole. They made this little boy so happy when there was so little to be happy about. Again, people who don’t know each other reaching out to help one another in a time of need, in a time of grief. And you don’t have to be a WWE fan to appreciate the kind acts shown in the video. If you have a heart, it will touch you.

go here. watch it. grab tissues. well, you may want to grab the tissues first. then watch it.

These stories have made me cry, but they have also brought me hope. The world is such a dark and scary place most of the time. These little rays of human compassion that sneak through from time to time remind me that not everything and everyone in the world is bad. There is good out there. People still care about each other even in a disconnected digital age. Most of us will never meet these grieving parents, but their stories have touched many of us and have made us better because of it. 

Because of these two sad stories, I have tried to focus less on stress and more on happiness. It’s been a rough couple of days for us personally. I feel like everything has been falling down around me, and then I realized its not that bad. It sucks, but it’s not that bad. I can’t control what happens in life. I can only enjoy what time I have been given with the people I love. Thats why I let Ellabelle run around in the driveway tonight. And why I let her steal my cup and drink all my pop. It’s also why I took lots of video of her these past two pays. I just want to soak in all of her that I can because I am lucky enough to be able to. So hug your babies. Call your mom. Give your dog a treat. Whatever it is that makes you happy, be happy they are still here.


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