I’ve had a lot going around here lately. It’s been almost a month since I’ve even bothered to write anything and that’s not cool in my book. I’ve been so overwhelmed with the stress from work and dealing with an ever growing, ever exploring toddler that, unfortunately, my “me time” for writing has been put on the back burner.
How she screamed every night because she didn’t want to miss anything Grandma and Grandpa might be doing in the living room so we had to hold her until she fell asleep. How she loved the pool even though the rest of us thought it was too cold.
How on the last day mommy took her out into the water and she loved it (because she wasn’t in the sand) and how much I wish I tried it earlier in the week but had decided to trust her instincts and not push her instead.
How while on vacation, I was furloughed. And then for about a week and a half after my vacation. And how I went back to work finally and how it was all downhill from there. And how I’m no longer employed there anymore. That’s a whole story I could write about, but I won’t because, honestly, I don’t want to ever come back and stumble upon it later in life. I’m ready to move on from this chapter in my life.
I didn’t write about how EB did her second breast cancer walk. Or how she was a huge hit in her pink car and tutu. Or how proud I was of me for being able to do the whole walk without stopping especially since I did only, maybe, a mile last year, post c-section.
And, last night, we had another huge milestone. Miss EB took her first unassisted steps! She took two away from mommy and one and a half back. She hasn’t tried again since, but that’s ok. At least I know she can do it.
So, now I’m a stay at home mom for a bit. I feel like I have even less time to myself because at least when I went to work I was alone for a while. I have apparently become a 24 hour mom since I no longer go to work. I love my kid, but I’m seriously itching for some me time. In fact, this is what it looked liked while I attempted to write this:
I’m no complaining (although I’m sure it may sound like it). I love my kid and the fact that its all about mommy these days. I love getting to hang out with her. I love not having to leave her. I also hate that I never get to leave her or get a moment of peace. So goes the constant struggle of being a mom. At least she’s good company.